Annnnndddd .... We're off!

Went to my fertility doctor this morning. Things are looking good! My lining is nice and my ovaries are quiet (which is a good thing at this stage). So now we're back in the swing of things!

Church these past few Sundays has been amazing and so uplifting. I feel as if I'm in a good place mentally and spiritually. I feel centered. I feel good. So if we don't get pregnant this month - at least we are back in the groove. We're finally doing something rather than just hanging out and waiting.

Warning! Heading in to possible TMI! The doc did want to take another culture of my cervix mucus. My doc is finding out that certain types of bacteria in the cervix can have an effect on fertility and and may "influence" pregnancy loss. My doc decided to test me for this as I've lost two pregnancies ... If I do carry bacteria, then Husband and I will be placed on meds (Husband, too, because we would just pass it back and forth. Ew).  I haven't done much research about it - but plan to! I'm the type of person that always wants to be informed and in-the-know. But it will definitely be interesting to see how the culture comes back. If it is indeed positive - then that would explain a lot!

Until then, I have my schedule set and we're back in the game!

~M

To quote Jessie Spano ...

"I'm so excited! I'm ... so ... scared!"

It's THE month, my friends. This is the month Husband and I are able to start trying to conceive again. I'm feeling a lot of emotions: excited, nervous, dread ...

I'm excited because I'm happy to be on the bandwagon again. I'm happy that we get another shot at conceiving. Excited and hoping that this time may be all that we need to get pregnant.

I'm nervous because I don't (really, really don't) want to go through what I did in January and February: the joy, the happiness, and then the sudden slap of horrible news, the pain, the tears ... I'm not so sure I can handle going through that again.

I am dreading this month in a way because of the drugs. It's been three months since I've had any fertility drugs pumped in my system. I don't like how they make me feel. I don't like the intrution with all the ultrasounds and shots and bloodwork. It was one thing when it happened every month - it's like I got into a rhythm. But now that I've been out of the game for three months - it's just a bit harder to step back in.

However, all the balls can't get rolling again until I get my period. So we wait. Because my cycle is so off from the miscarriage and D&C - I'm not exactly sure when my period will come - I've got a ballpark guess. That's about it. AND I'm getting a bit more nervous in the fact that Husband will be leaving for Colorado in a few weeks. So if my lovely period doesn't come SOON the timing could be totally off and we miss our window. I would in no way want him to miss Colorado (his best friend's bachelor party). Husband has been looking forward to this since last year!

THUS - I just pray. Pray that everything will work out. That if this is our month - then God will take control and it will be as it should be.

There's not much more to do than that ...

~M